If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
