Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize