Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It's rum buckets o'clock
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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