return my video game
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize