It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
