I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
