i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
