Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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