its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
