Only a mothe r could love this liver
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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