There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
