Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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