I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Randomize