hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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