It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
