Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
