Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
