I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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