i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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