sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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