whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
