If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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