His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
