Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
