every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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