apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
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