I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Randomize