The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
