it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
