I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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