Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
