even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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