Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
i think i just lost a toe
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