One girl and one boy is just not enough.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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