i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm having to shit out rocks
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