I think i peed on brittanys purse
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Randomize
