So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
