Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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