I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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