the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
