Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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