either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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