next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
