I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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