Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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