On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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