There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
this just has baby written all over it
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Randomize
