can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
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