I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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