Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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