I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
