Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
