Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
